Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Scoping Out New Territory

So, as many of you know, we have had news about the job with the church. Mike did not get it. He talked with one of the pastors on Monday and found out that he didn't get it. The reasons told for the other person getting it were related to flexibility and some experience.
This has probably been a harder struggle for me than for Mike - although he's had the disappointed and angry emotions - he's usually better about dealing with them! I on the other had am not always the best at dealing with my emotions.
However, I did for the most part, vent only to God and dealt with my emotions with Him instead of taking them out on anyone else. The honest emotions were anger and frustration and a lot of questioning. In my eyes this was perfect for us in every single way - there wasn't a negative about it. I thought that we were perfect for the position, and everyone I talked to thought that we were perfect for the position too! But I'm not God and neither is anyone else ... and apparently this wasn't the perfect position for us. God has something else in store for us.
The hardest part is going through something like this and feeling like the only thing we got out of it was a big fat character struggle! And also, knowing all the right answers and Truths of the Lord in my head but not feeling them on a real level or in a real way.

God has sure tested me through this. This was the first time - that I can really remember - where I was out-and-out angry with God. I was mad - and I told Him so! But it was also really good for me to experience that feeling and to communicate it with Him - just Him. It's a small reminder of what I'm supposed to be doing every single day with every single emotion that I encounter.

Well, on another note. We still do not know where we will be living and we are moving out on Sunday. We will either be in Prior Lake or in Eagan. If we can get our money back (long story) from Prior Lake then we will for sure be in Eagan. If we can't get our money back then we will probably be in Prior Lake. I'm torn between the two. I really like and want the Prior Lake apartment because we would be in a 3 bedroom with a really nice kitchen! And it's extremely affordable. The Eagan one is affordable too but it's only a two bedroom and it's smaller than the two bedroom we're in right now. :( But it's also closer to everything and everyone!
Oy!

I'm off ... to feed the baby! The wonderful baby George.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

 

 

 
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CONTINUE to Stand Fast ... an unenthusiastic ooohrah ...

We are unfortunately still waiting to hear about the job with the church. It's mainly my fault because I misunderstood what Mike told me about when they would be contacting him with the answer. I guess they told him that they would have the decision "the 3rd week of April." Which is, of course, anytime this week. I thought that Mike told me they would contacting him today, the 18th, at the latest. So, if you were one of the many that thought we would find out today - I apologize! I misunderstood and unfortunately mislead many of you.
Although I don't enjoy the, what feels like, endless wait I know that God is using it to grow me. It seems like patience with answered prayers is a continual area of growth for me. So needless to say, I feel like God is calling me to continue to stand fast and simply trust Him.

"However, whether I choose to believe it or not, if I am His child, the Truth is that 'His grace is sufficient for me.' (This is assuming, of course, that I haven't taken on myself responsibilities He never intended me to carry. If the burden is God-given, I can go on by His grace.) His grace is sufficient for every moment, every circumstance, every detail, every need, and every failure of my life.
. . .
What do you need God's grace for?"
-The Lies Women Believe-

This is my book study book and what I've been reading about this week. We have been talking about circumstances and the lies that we tend to believe about our circumstances. This chapter has come at a really good time for me. Part of me didn't want to read it because I knew that I needed to. With everything that's been going on with Mike's job situation and our house situation and the wait with the church job - I needed to read this chapter. It's been really easy for me to examine our circumstances and let them determine my mood, my attitude, and my responses. But God's been quietly showing me how I can't base the way that I think and act on our circumstances. I can feel the emotion of them but I can't act on those emotions, at least not all the time. This weekend God met me in my quiet times and gave me His unending peace. Peace with where we are going to live, even though we haven't signed a lease anywhere. Peace with Mike's job situation. And peace with the church job situation, even though we haven't gotten an answer yet. I don't feel this peace every moment or even every day ... but I know He has it waiting for me and all I have to do is take a hold of it and trust Him.

As far as the quote goes - it's what stood out to me yesterday as I was reading. That as long as I take up what God has given me, and not extra, He will continue to give me the grace to go on.

PS we've got some new pictures on the Slide - so take a look!


Sunday, April 08, 2007

Liberty

Then Jesus showed up
Said "Before we go"
"I thought that we might reminisce"
"See one night in your life"
"When you turned out the light"
"You asked for and prayed for my forgiveness"

You cried wolf

The tears they soaked your fur
The blood dripped from your fangs
You said, "What have I done?"
You loved that lamb
With every sinful bone
And there you wept alone
Your heart was so contrite

You said, "Jesus, please forgive me of my crimes
Sanctify this withered heart of mine
Stay with me until my life is through
And on that day please take me home with you"
Relient K*Deathbed*Five Score and Seven Years Ago

I am that wolf, you are that wolf, and it was I that killed that precious Savior of mine. My hands are stained with His blood and yet He washes them clean continually. Though I try, each day they are stained once more and no day here will they ever be pure. But thankfully, His stay in my heart is for forevermore and I am able to start and end each day anew. My soul praises His decision for death and even more, His purpose to rise on this day some thousand years past. For in His death we we find freedom and forgiveness, but in His life after that death we find meaning and purpose. For His rising changes everything. Thank You, my Lord, my Savior, my God.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Stand Fast

So... quick update.
Mike had his interview with Evergreen Lakeville tonight and he thought that it went really well. The one thing that threw me off is that they told him that the decision won't be made for up to two weeks. I thought they were making the decision this weekend!
They have a couple more interviews and then the pastors of Lakeville need to get together and pray about everything so that they are confident in their decision. So, I understand all of this, I just didn't expect it to take so long!

The one thing that I need prayer for is my own faith and trust. I am such a planner. I have my plans and when they change and get messed up I have a hard time readjusting. It's something that I'm constantly working on, but it's hard. So finding out that our home decision, ie: where we are going to live when our lease is up at the end of the month, is on hold shakes me up a little! I trust Mike and that he will always do whatever is in his power to take care of us and provide for us. I trust the Lord to do the same - in an even bigger way. Now I just need to put that trust into my actions! There is no need to worry or be anxious - the Lord knows what He's doing - and He's telling us to stand fast: to stay where we are and not move until He tells us!

"So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6:31-34
God knows what we need and He will take care of us. I just need to trust!

Ooohrah

*Ask God to show you His good plan for your life.*
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

This is Lakeville's daily prayer for today and it's not only my prayer for the church but my personal prayer for our family. It is perfect for our family because it has been our prayer for the last, almost, two and a half years. Today part of that prayer was answered PRAISE GOD!! Mike accepted a new job today. He will be working at Transmission Doctor in Apple Valley starting on Thursday the 19th. This is an amazing answer to prayers because his new schedule is Monday through Friday 7-3:30! I am so very thankful for this!
We are still praying for the job with Evergreen Lakeville. Mike has his interview tonight and the decision is being made this weekend. We so strongly feel that this is where God wants us and are excited about the possibility of serving the church in this way, as an entire family. But ultimately we desire God's will for us, so if that means that we do not get this job - that's alright. We just ask for God's will to be what is done!


Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Figuring it Out

This is our first post on this blog and I'm still trying to figure it all out. I've posted before and know how to do all that ... just working on some of the details. :) This blog will be an occasional update on our life, our family, our kids, as well as personal thoughts from me - the wifey. We have a xanga site as well and you can still catch up with us there. :)